How Am I?

I is good.

I have a new addiction. Despite my crack-ho frenemy's prediction that I would need to call someone crying when I couldn't find a heartbeat, I have managed to find that little ticker every single day for the last two weeks. Imagine my complete amazement and excitement that I no longer have to listen to my pubic hair to locate fetal heart tones. The uterus? It's movin' on up. That's right. At 12w4d, I can now actually listen to my belly to find my comfort.

While I used to enjoy a nightly glass of red to relax after a long or challenging day, I now snuggle up with a tube of water-based lubricant and....oh, wait, that doesn't sound right. I now snuggle up to my doppler. Hearing that little gallop is like a breath of fresh air.

Am I enjoying my pregnancy. Hell yez I'm enjoying my pregnancy. Did I vomit a few times? Hell yez I vomiked a few times. I also grinned with each vomit. I loved to vomit. I don't mean that in a bulimic freaky weight loss way. I mean that in a 'my-morning-sickness-wasn't-really-that-bad-at-all-and-it-merely-served-as-a-reassurance-to-the-pregnant-state-I'm-in' thing. I think I'm done with the vomiting. That's cool. Now I have a doppler, so it's all good.

Am I telling people? Yes. Now I'm telling. Well, truth be told I'd already told a lot of people, but now I'm telling general people. Well, other people are now telling general people...I just keep my mouth shut because it still feels strange and awkward. I met a new girl at work last week who is 6 months along and after a 30 minute conversation finally worked up the nerve to tell her I was pregnant. I felt like an impostor. I felt like a fake pregnant person trying to inch my way into the world of the preggos.

Then Tuesday, in a class at work, a co-worker shouted out "She's having a baby" for all the room to hear. I was surrounded by congratulations and felt a sudden urge to run down to the ER and grab the doppler. I was simply positive that such a public outcry of my pregnancy was the equivalent of putting a gun to my baby's head. Dare I be so bold as to accept the congratulatory mutterings of mere acquaintances? Ack! No worries. Baby was still alive at the end of the day. Apparently pregnancy announcements don't cause destruction and havoc.

Buying maternity clothes hasn't cursed things yet either. I'm in an awkward in-between stage. I'm too big for my regular clothes (my thighs are pregnant too)...and maternity clothes just look saggy and stupid. When I wear them I can see people looking at me like, 'dude, is she pregnant or just trying to cover her protuberant abdomen?'. I've decided I can wear scrubs and sweat pants for the majority of this bump-growing experience. I bought one or two 'going out in public' outfits...and we'll see where things grow from here.

Am I having a boy or a girl? Well I obviously don't know that yet. I will know in December, which is approaching quickly. I am preference-less. The heart rate is still 162 beats per minute. And I did pee into one of those gender predicting kit games that are probably a crock but are still another fun thing to pee on...and it said I was having a girl. Again. I am preference-less. I want a baby with arms and legs and a face to kiss. That is all.

Oh, and by the way, there will be no bump pictures on this blog. Maybe...maaayyyybe I'll put one up when I'm on the tail end of the third trimester. Till then, sorry. May I recommend you google.image 'baby bump' if you are craving pregnant belly photos. Nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing.

See. Nothing eventful. Just a plain old 'how am I' post...because someone asked. I am so glad there is nothing eventful here.

Hopefully there will be nothing eventful here until December.

Booorrrrring.