Oogles of Googles

"But, Murgdan, you already just did this one last week. It's too soon!"

Whatever. They made me laugh. I can't NOT share it, can I? That wouldn't be fair!

These are search terms that led some special people to my blog. In case you are wondering how to find out your own search terms, here's how. Go to GoogleAnalytics...and follow the directions to set it up for your blog. It's worth the time, I promise. These could keep me going on for days.

And we're off!

"3D Fetus Keychain"

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Holy shit. Seriously. I googled it. I found this. Disturbing, yes? And then. Ohmygod. If you google image search this set of words, what do you think pops up? Yeah, the images from this post I did around Christmas. Yikes.

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"8 to 9 coffee and tea bad for you to get conceive"

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Dude. I am so feeling you right now. I tryin' to get conceive and I quitted the coffee (mostly). If my little 2 coffee a day bad for me to get conceive, 8 to 9 really bad for you to get conceive. Good luck get conceive. You be good momma.
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"animated pictures of the waitress brain"

Again. Googled it myself. I was looking forward to this one. What does an animated picture of a waitress brain look like anyway? Nope. There was nothing. Except I found a link to this post. Gah! Whatever.
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"How can wax hurt your cat?"

That depends. Number one. Why is you cat near wax? Did you can eat the wax, step in the wax, have hot candle wax dripped on his little furballness? Nope. I'm getting the feeling that you are possibly referring to waxing another kind of pussy cat...and in that case...wax can really really hurt your cat.

"How to do sex to get pregnet"

My first instinct was to berate you for asking such a thing as 'how to do sex', but then I thought to myself, hell, how do I do sex to get pregnant? If there is a way, and it's different from just regular 'doing sex', I might google this too...just to find out. Because the regular 'doing sex', just isn't really working out for me.

"HSG giddiness"

Yeah. I wasn't giddy so much. There really is nothing giddy about spreading it wide open in front of two radiology techs and a radiologist who prefers to read x-rays rather than actually touching human beings, only to have a large catheter inserted through your cervix followed by the most horrid photography session one could possibly endure. Yeah. If you're giddy, you had the wrong kind of doctor.

"I hate my fetus"

Hi. I'm Murgdan. Are you interested in giving your hated fetus up for adoption? If so, please send me an e-mail. I don't have any feelings of hate towards your fetus, and I think I'd be a pretty good mom.

"Laughing with semen on face"

Um. Well. If you found it funny, I guess that's ok? We like to inject humor into our lovemaking from time to time as well. I just wouldn't be laughing about all that wasted semen is all.

"so much work taking an infant out"

Awww. Poor wittle you! I'm so sorry it's so much freakin' work to take your flesh and blood out with you! You should just stay home. This life is obviously too much for you to handle. Why don't you lend me your infant? I'll take him or her out for you anytime.

***There are just too many. Too many more. Must stop now***

Ok, ok. One more for the road...I'll leave you with this smart Googlers question. Think about it really hard before you answer now...

"What are the odds of getting pregnant from a blow job?"